((Banner:
Living America’s Opioid Nightmare))
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More than 115 Americans die each day from opioid overdoses.
VOA looks at three stories from the epidemic.))
((PKG)) ALLISON: PART 2
((Banner: Allison: Part 2))
((Producers: Chris Simkins, Jeff Swicord, Jacquelyn De Phillips))
((Camera: Jeff Swicord, Chris Simkins, Marcus Harton))
((Banner: While recovering from opioid addiction, Allison Norland is trying to regain custody of her daughter.))
((Map: Miami, Florida))
((Allison Norland, Recovering Addict))
I have court for shoplifting. My greatest fear is going on probation and losing my job and then, in turn, having the family court process drag out even longer. That means more time without my daughter, and that means falling back into a depression, and that means a greater chance for relapse. It’s not something I’m willing to allow to happen.
((NATS))
Allison: Good afternoon, Judge.
Judge Gonzalez-Paulson: Ms. Norland, you’re being charged with petty theft, and is the state ready to proceed?
State prosecutor: State is, Your Honor.
Judge Gonzalez-Paulson: Okay, thank you. Ma’am, so this is the offer that they’re making to you. It’s either pre-trial diversion which is usually a course that can be like four to twelve hours, depending on the course. The other offer, if you don’t want to take the class, is a withhold of adjudication court cost. What would you like to do today?
Allison: I’ll do the pre-trial diversion.
Judge: Pre-trial diversion?
Allison: Yes, ma’am.
Judge: Ok perfect. So, I’m going to put you to…..
((Allison Norland, Recovering Addict))
I’m grateful for the outcome. This could’ve been a lot worse. This is kind of best case scenario and it’s not something that I ever thought would happen but I’m grateful it did.
((Allison Norland, Recovering Addict; and, John Lowe, Allison’s Husband))
I think I was about 23 when I found out I was six and a half months pregnant with my first daughter, Payton. Seven months, 21 days I was clean and sober. I was living with my husband’s father and on November 3rd of 2013, he drove up off the driveway into the backyard and hit and killed my daughter in front of me.
((NATS))
John: That little girl reached parts of my heart that I never even knew existed. Ready to go?
Allison: We let it go together. You ready?
Allison: I wrote, Mommy loves you. I miss you each and every second of every minute of every day. Love you, bug. Until we meet again, Mommy.
((Allison Norland, Recovering Addict; and Jen Ellison, Peer Counselor))
My mom is...I think her concern is Sawyer as it always has been. I think she's concerned about our stability. She thinks the process is moving quite fast as far as reunification and everything which it's not. In her mind it is because we, I mean, I'll speak for myself. I spent seven plus years getting high and from what she's seen, it's only been a year that I've been sober.
Jen: So, basically your mom doesn't like that it's a process.
Allison: Right, I think she wants to do joint custody for the remainder of Sawyer's life.
Jen: Do I think shared custody for the next 18 years? No, I don't think it's realistic at all. But do I think your mom should have, like, open visitation?
Allison: Absolutely
Jen: Yeah. It's actually what's best for you, your husband and your child.
Allison: Right.
Jen: I mean, what's best for her is to be with her parents.
Allison: Right. I'm extremely sensitive when it comes to her. And it's not just because of this situation. It's because of what happened with Payton. I know I'm being judged so harshly because of that. Like it's, my mom has fears over that as well and it's not that they're out of place. I just, I don't,
Jen: But they're not the same.
Allison: Right. I know that in those circumstances everyone looks for someone to blame and that person was me because I am.....
Jen: It was an accident.
Allison: Right. But I mean…..
Jen: Accidents happen.
Allison: I blame myself so I kind of.....
Jen: That takes time.
Allison: And it sucks that I feel like I'm not going to be able to live up to them and that makes me feel inadequate.
Jen: You need to learn how to accept that you'll probably never please your parents.
((Barbara Norland, Allison’s Mother))
My husband Mike was an alcoholic. He died while drinking and driving when Allison was in high school.
((NATS))
Obviously the example that he set with his addiction wasn't all the greatest for a child.
((NATS))
Allison: Hey!
Sawyer: Mommy!
((Barbara Norland, Allison’s Mother))
I know she smoked pot. I don't think pot is an issue. But I do feel that when she went away to school, she got into some groups that were doing more than just marijuana. After Sawyer was born, Allison lived here. To feed her drug habit, she was coming up with these unbelievable stories. You know, I got a speeding ticket. I don't have money to pay. I need money for daycare. My check was short. She made up this one story that one of the drug dealers showed up at church with a gun, and that he told her that he knew where her daughter went to daycare and he knew where she was living.
((NATS))
John: You see your new seat?
((Barbara Norland, Allison’s Mother))
They both stole from me. John did some things that were totally inappropriate, as far as violating my, my identity.
((NATS))
Allison: Where’s your Jeep, Doctor?
((Barbara Norland, Allison’s Mother))
I got full custody in November. They've been having the opportunity to have her on the weekends. And then they don't call at all during the week. They could call at night to say good night.
I just feel that Sawyer is here for a reason and I don't think it's to be the reward because her mom and dad finally have their act together in their addiction. I'm very proud of both of them. They're great people. But I don't think either one of them have the capacity to be able to really take care of her.
((NATS))
Allison: Alright, bye. Yes! I’m so excited!
((Allison Norland, Recovering Addict))
We have put a $500 deposit down on an apartment. Our intention is to move by the end of the month. My grandmother passed away on my dad's side. She left something of an inheritance for each one of her kids. My grandmother's gone but she definitely left us with some hope.
((NATS))
Allison: Put it back.
((Allison Norland, Recovering Addict))
We've been staying in the three quarter way house together, and needless to say we're, we're kind of ready to take that next step. As soon as we have the apartment, then we will start having overnight visitation with our daughter which is absolutely the end goal. We're working towards reunification. It’s basically just speed-balling us forward and it's amazing. It's definitely a blessing.
((NATS))
John: I’ll open the door, you get the gun. How about that? I’m blowing these guys up.
((Allison Norland, Recovering Addict))
I want it to feel like home, to be something that we can all grow in because it is a growing process. John is a little bit more easygoing. He wants a nice kitchen. So as long as we find a place with a nice kitchen, he's happy.
((John Lowe, Allison’s Husband))
You know, I have concerns. I have concerns that, you know, the money that we're going to be paying every month. Not that it's not possible to pay. I just don't want to be house poor, you know. I want to be in a position where, where we do things now, you know, with Sawyer. When we go see her, we visit with her, I still want to be able to try and save some money too.
((Allison Norland, Recovering Addict))
I don't think it would necessarily be unreasonable to cut back smoking or take away us eating out which we do a lot. To not be, as you said, house poor and still facilitate taking Sawyer out and doing all the things we like to do with her.
((NATS))
Bailiff: All rise.
Judge Cohen: All right, good afternoon everyone. Okay, so we got mom, dad, grandma. How are you guys doing?
Allison: Really great.
Judge Cohen: Yeah? Everything's going well?
Allison: Very well.
Judge Cohen: Tell me.
((Judge Jeri Cohen, Miami-Dade Family Court))
This is a very demanding program and they have a lot to do in a very short period of time, not because the court said so but because the Adoption and Safe Families Act require us to reunify families within a year to 18 months.
((NATS))
Judge Cohen: But I think the fact that we were so tough on you. We were like a brick wall with you. You couldn't get around us really and I think that that's what helped.
John: Well, I appreciate it very much.
Allison: And that's not something we're used to, is that brick wall.
Judge Cohen: I want to hear from the family members that they feel that they're stable enough to take the children into their custody.
((NATS))
Judge Cohen: Grandma, how do you feel about reunification?
Barbara: I think that you know they've been doing an incredible job just focusing on them. I think the transition of reunification should be as smooth and not hasty, like John said, you know, just looking for a place in Miami.
Judge Cohen: They're both intelligent. They’ll work it out. You know this is what adults do. They work these issues out.
((Judge Jeri Cohen, Miami-Dade Family Court))
We're not asking parents to be perfect. We're not asking them to live the way that you might live or I might live. But we are asking them to live sober lifestyles, free of violence and to be able to nurture and care for their children. That's what we're looking for.
((NATS))
Allison: Because she deserves the best version of us.
Judge: Right. So, this is what we want to hear from our parents, right?
((Barbara Norland, Allison’s Mother))
I think Judge Cohen is amazing and she understands that this is a disease. But I think it's wrong that Sawyer is used as the carrot to keep them clean.
((NATS))
Judge Cohen: You know and then we’ll do sort of a slower reunification like we’ll do weekends and if that works out, we’ll do during the week and we’ll give them a chance to get their feet wet.
((Barbara Norland, Allison’s Mother))
Oh, you're doing an amazing job. So, therefore, you get an apartment and if the apartment is great, then we'll let Sawyer spend the night. And then we'll let her spend the weekend and pretty soon you're going to get her back a 100 percent.
That's just not right because being sober doesn't qualify someone to be a great parent.
((NATS))
Judge Cohen: If you need to come in before so we can do overnights just get it on the calendar.
Barbara: And I just feel Judge Cohen to get this out of the court is pushing it. And that is a court process. It's not a development process.
I just haven't seen that John and Allison rearrange their lives for Sawyer. My fear is that as hard as she wants to be sober, that, one day, she's going to let her guard down.
((Barbara Norland, Allison’s Mother))
I sleep so well at night knowing that Sawyer is safe. And that if I get a phone call, I get a phone call. I got a phone call when my husband died. Got a phone call when Payton died. If I get another phone call, it's not anything to do with me.
And I'm not going to say it's God's will. But it is what it is and death is death. And I, again, I've come to terms that it's okay if it's her, but I'm not okay if they have Sawyer again. I'm not. I'm not.
((Text over video:
Living America’s Opioid Nightmare
continues on VOA Connect in the weeks to come))
